LIVEJOURNAL

callir @ 2005-09-30T12:26:00

2005-09-30T19:27:12Z

leaving lj.
aim cute like cancer
buh bye.

callir @ 2005-09-16T10:57:00

2005-09-16T17:57:53Z

i forgot to mention some things.

i miss everyone,
but heather most of all.

i think that's it.
kay

callir @ 2005-09-06T15:13:00

2005-09-06T22:23:38Z

IM MISSING MY HEATHERBOO.
:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(
school is school again!
so for some crazy fucked up reason, my dad decides to "leave", whatever that means.
well it turned out that it meant he wasn't coming home and he was going to sleep at a motel. whatafag. like honestly. way to run away from your problems, that aren't even problems, you're just a drama queen. he called this morning and i was very short and blunt and probably really obvious that i wasn't pleased with him at all.
other than that, nothing is really amazing about today.
in fact i'm probably in a really bad mood right now.

i really really really really really hate how i am so fucking emotional all the time now.
how did i go from being this hardass that thought crying was for pussies, to being the pussy that cries all the time? i just don't get it.. not at all.

i am also about to pick my face off, thank you.

ps.

i deleted alot of people. just comment if you want back on.

callir @ 2005-08-24T22:02:00

2005-08-25T05:07:12Z

Today at work something funny happened that i wanted to write about cos it was funny, but i forgot. how depressing. there is this one guy that comes in every once in a while and he says to me today "been a bad day?" and i say, "oh not too bad" and he said something or other and he was like. "well. you make sure your boyfriend takes you out for all the hard work you do" i just laughed but i was thinking, oh if i had a boyfriend. do do do do. i'm pretty sure if i didn't get really bored sometimes i would delete this. but i have to get up early in the morning. oh and i also am chatting with this boy named bobby that lives close to me and he is cute but heather says he has a big nose. he's cute mk. im sleepy. i guess im done here, time to brush my teeth and get in bed. night.

haiirrr cut.

2005-08-17T19:38:12Z

I got a hair cut this morning :]
I like it alot!
I just got back from hanging out with Bryce.
We went to SMOOTHER KING.
& I got a PNAPPLE SURPISE something smoothie.
It was good.
We just talked about drugs and sex basically the whole time.

callir @ 2005-08-13T11:54:00

2005-08-13T18:55:05Z

if i wasn't so fucking lazy i'd delete like half of you all.

callir @ 2005-08-11T21:36:00

2005-08-12T04:44:06Z

there isn't much to ever update about but i'm going to try.
last night i cried myself stupid.
i also watched the movie pumpkin. it was good.
i woke up today at 1230. and played on the computer and wawtched tv.
then gregory came home from school and we chatted.
SOMEONE ATE THE JELLO I GAVE HIM. i was upset.
i went to work. mr simpson was a real asshole tonight.
caitlin came to the store and every time i see her she looks more and more like me.
fucking whore.
so i'm cutting my hair off. i'm scared.
well anywas mr simpson made me clean the girls bathroom. lamer.
i came home and cooked some chinese good shit.
then i talked to greg, and then he went to bed.
and i've been laying here watching tv, and then i washed my face.
i have to make myself get up and do it.
i'm about to take my pills.
tomorrow i have orientation for school. at fucking 930 in the morning.
i want to go to the mall afterwards. jamie is supposed to go with me
but she didn't call me tonight. so i guess i'll go by myself. because i'm a lamer with no friends. i shop better alone anyways. i'll probably just steal shit alot.
because i'm a kleptomaniac.
oh AND cosmopolitan came out with a new issue today and it's like. SO BIG. the front says OUR BIGGEST ISSUE EVER. AND YES SIZE DOES MATTER. i love it.
okay i hate my bra. it's going now. BYEBYEEEEEEEE CMNT K THX

callir @ 2005-08-05T21:41:00

2005-08-06T04:44:56Z

i don't want summer to end. i'd rather die than go back to school. i'll miss everything. i'll miss sleeping till 12 every day, and i'll miss metting friends for lunch, and i'll miss going to the park late at a night and i'll miss the parties and i'll miss everything.

now it's, buying pens and notebooks and fabric to make a new bag.
i will kill everything.

callir @ 2005-08-04T10:48:00

2005-08-04T17:49:24Z

Well I said "Matt, you've hurt my feelings" & he said "... do you have feelings?"

I didn't know how to even reply.

callir @ 2005-08-01T23:03:00

2005-08-02T06:07:42Z

livejournal means nothing to meeee. not a thing because who really cares about the things i have to say! no one!
i went to galveston for the weekend, you know "the beach", so they say. but it's not really a beach. it's a pulluted gross, dead body toting, body of water. i dont know. i'm just pessamist. i missed greg alot and then he was mean to me. or more of i was mean to him. it went both ways. eh.
anyways i got my shirt that says "mess with texas" and it's awesome
i went to the movies tonight with patrick we saw bad news bears it was great funny. leslie was there and that was REALLLLL WEIRD (his xgf).
anyways. i'm tired. of everything. and i just got back from vacation. i'm in such a negative mood. i wouldn't mind dying right now. i'm so bad at this too.
my cat is stealing the mouse. bye now.

callir @ 2005-07-15T23:00:00

2005-07-16T06:02:34Z

callir @ 2005-07-13T23:52:00

2005-07-14T06:58:11Z

well i think i did something stupid.
and i'm sad cos heather doesn't seem to care about talking to me right now, even though i need her to talk to me. oh well.
tonight has been weird.
my dad came home drunk and wouldn't leave me alone. but he gave me 90$. ok cool.
i made greg upset. by telling him things that just happened to come out and really shouldn't have.
but jesus christ i love him so fucking much and i can't do shit about it.
i fucking suck, at everything.
someone should just fucking kill me now.
that'd be great.
thanks.

callir @ 2005-07-10T22:32:00

2005-07-11T04:30:57Z

well this weekend was good. greg is home and i am excited! and happy. i went to "girls gone wild" night. but i didnt get to go in since i'm 17. boo. i feel like such a dumbfuck because billy fucking corgan was playing across the street, and there we were walking around deep ellum looking like real shitfucks. MAN DAMNIT. I MISSED BILLY CORGAN AND I WAS RIGHT THERE. fuck me, you know. anyways. we went back to the apartment. played halo, listened to techno, got scared of dustin and his scarry ass when he's pissed, steven had a seizure, jennifer took him to the hospital, blah blah, everyone did drugs ( i didn't! ), and again, I MISSED BILLY FUCKING CORGAN. I WANTED TO KILL MYSELF. fuck me i suck. anyways. bye?????

callir @ 2005-07-06T22:38:00

2005-07-07T05:39:26Z

I HATE MY FACE.

callir @ 2005-07-04T23:03:00

2005-07-05T06:11:42Z

hey guys. i just got done hanging out with Raychel. we were in DeSoto. first we hung out with Micheal & so kid named Chris. it was okay. we just watched tv basically at this apartment. then we went to Raychel's friend Cameron's house. & alot of people were there. i can't remember alot of other people's name except for Randy cos he was pretty. we went out to his field and chilled and watched fireworks. it was quite dark outside and for some reason i felt like i was in a black and white picture. it was weird. i dont know. i had a good time. Raychel is amazing. i didn't think i'd ever hang out with people that i work with but she's great! we discovered that we both have a cool obsession over Frank Sinatra, and i just love that because all my other friends think i'm weird because of it!
Greg left today for florida for a week, & i'm very sad about it for some reason. i can't wait till he gets home!
So, if you didn't know i'm pretty sure i lost my baby tobey, my beloved cat. and i think my brother is already trying to replace her with a new kitten. he named it "junior" i'm not sure what i think of it. i feel bad because i feel like i'm giving up on tobey. i dont want to get attached to this "junior" because it's just not right to just stop thinking tobey will come back and move on. that's fucked up. so "junior" should go away.
okay i'm going to bed. night guys. leave comments

callir @ 2005-07-03T11:59:00

2005-07-03T19:09:00Z

hi. this weekend consisted of, a road trip, seeing a beautiful boy, hugs& kisses, laziness, watching wild boyz, invader zim, viva la bam, & edward scissorhands, driving around & picking up food & other "supplies", nakedness, sexyness, sleeping, morning sex, going out to lunch & dinner, laying in bed all day, & spending all this time with Greg. thank you for a wonderful weekend. It was just amazing. i tried so hard not to cry on the way home. ♥

callir @ 2005-06-27T19:45:00

2005-06-28T03:10:44Z

sup livejournal! haha lj is lame & stupid, but i don't care. i'm in a great mood. last night i had a really great dream & i woke up very happy. talked to the boy that owns my heart, & then i went out with ashley. it was fun! we went to brookshires to get some cash, & then we went to cheddars, & i got some awesome cheese fries. & then we went and watched bewitched. it was cute. then we came home. and burned cds! yes!
so heather got me addicted to this website. it's about confession. all you do is confess crap. it's fun. i like to read about the idiots :]. it's wonderful. please go look at it. and confess while you're there. no one will even know it's you!
also. i'm pretty sure i like this boy matt. actually he's not a boy. he's like, a man? he's old. illegal. but he's the nicest guy ever. he bought me a flower and wrote me a fairy tale. but i heard he has a girlfriend. but he's got the hots for me. Ajeana said so. she talked to me about it.
anyways. i need a serious boyfriend now. it's about time someone takes care of me. because i sure need it.
that's all for now. thank you&byeeee.
PS. i can't find my cat tobey. ITS AWFUUUULLLLL, i will cry!

callir @ 2005-06-25T01:51:00

2005-06-25T06:57:47Z

i've found out what i want. but now i've just got to find it! i discovered what's wrong with everything. as if the puzzle pieces are almost done, all i've got to do is figure out who he is! i wish it was easy for me to just not expect a thing. and i pretend not to, but i so do. i wish i could just be happy with life and let it flow but i can't help but think in the back of my head. "where's the boy you're supposed to be with!? is that him? could this be it! omg!" ... yes. i'm lame like that. i hate high standards. i let them slide once. and i felt stupid for even letting that happen. he wanted a girl that was ignorant and brainless. and i pretended to be that girl. i did. i let myself do it. he made me fake, i was who he wanted me to be because i was so desperate and he was beautiful. i always let the beautiful ones walk all over me.
this update is pointless because it seems like i'm just rambling. but maybe someone will notice that i'm having maybe a breakthrough. or maybe it's all downhill from here.(and to think i didn't think it could get much worse)

callir @ 2005-06-21T16:52:00

2005-06-21T22:02:34Z

haha okay. so i've been hanging out with patrick. and we discovered that we're permafried. it took us a while but everything was so messed up, it just had to be said. it's fun. i loveth patrick. we're great friends.
i bought two aprons at a garage sale for 25cents each and made them into tank top.
some one please give me an award for being so AMAZING.

down on your knees and gravel, my bitches.
LOVE ME.

callir @ 2005-06-20T12:06:00

2005-06-20T17:11:09Z

er. things aren't going quite well as planned. i don't understand why things can't go right for once. like seriously. we've made plans three times in less than a month and if this is the third time we can't hang out i'm going to go balistic. (spelling?) i dont know. it fusterates me. i don't know if that means something. who knows. anyways. last night was okay. time with friends. time with people i didn't know and it weirded me out. yeah. my livejournal is stupid and pointless.

callir @ 2005-06-18T16:34:00

2005-06-18T21:42:58Z

so, when i said "fuck school", i didn't really mean it. but i did mean it when i said i wanted to bartend! wooh! the last couple nights all i have been doing is working. last night i worked till 11. EWWWW. but then when i went outside, there was a car parked beside mine and i was skeptical, but it turned out to be Bailey, Amanda and this girl Ashley! i was so happy! so we went up to the park and chilled and did other things. for about an hour. and then i had to leave. yeah i went home, talked to Sammy for a while, and then i went to bed. and slept. very hardcore slept. good. Today i have spent most of talking with Greg and Heather and a few random people that pop up every once in a while. Yeah. soon i am going to go visit Greg. I'm scared. things keep getting in the way though. like we seriously have so many cancellations to our plans. i used to not believe in luck, but.. is this just bad luck? are we really not meant to see each other? i don't know, but it's sad and i want to see him BAD. okay. that's all. i've got to go to work now. GODDAMN YOU WORK SUCKASS.

callir @ 2005-06-16T00:30:00

2005-06-16T05:31:31Z

okay so i decided what i want to do with my life!
fuck college, i'm going to bartend.
yay!

callir @ 2005-06-14T21:26:00

2005-06-15T03:17:39Z

well. livejournal is lame now. i hardly know any of you people. like seriously. i can think of maybe.. four of you, that i know by name. oh no, five. maybe. that i can think of anyways. i would leave if i didn't feel like updating randomly sometimes. i like greatestjournal better anyways most of the time.
my day has been not so bad. my cleaning stupid lady woke me up today. by her loud ass talking on the phone. lame. i went back to sleep. and then woke up again thanks to her loud ass vaccuum cleaner. (i know i sound like a stuck up snob because i have a cleaning lady, but trust me she's good for NOTHING)
i went to the park and to the fountain of water thing that i didn't know i had here. pictures are available. but i dont feel like posting that.
i had lots of time to think. about nothing really. about how i am going no where in life, pretty much. like i'm pretty much stuck right where i am. so there's nothing else to really say. mkay. well. goodbye.
/end poitless post. mhm.

callir @ 2005-06-13T10:08:00

2005-06-13T17:22:02Z

well, i am extremely happy to say that i am ungrounded. and i had a very good night of being ungrounded! i went over to Lisa's because there are ALWAYS people there. and i was RIGHT there WERE! Ashley, Corey, Aaron, and Jessica were the main people. they've like been living there haha. but we were just sitting around. and then me and Ashley went to sonic and bought three junior banana splits, and some cheese sticks. and we payed in all cash. the poor boy was mad. and we apologized muchly. hahah. then we went back, and then we ate. and then we left to go to the Shell to find some people, like we always do! on the way there, Aaron decided to pass us up on the ONE LANE roads. there was a cop. pulling someone else over. when he did that. and i was like. "there was a cop!" and we were going pretty fast. and we got quiet and then ashley said "FUCK IT GO FASTER." hahahah i laughed so hard and we did. REBELS! so we get there and almost cry because there was NO ONE there. not really cried. but billy showed up randomly. so that was fun i guess. we just chilled at the shell for a while and did nothing. then we went back to lisa's house and we went SWIMMING! it was fun and it was cold! and that's about it. i went home. i had a good night. chatted with Greg the rest of the night, which, is still good. and i enjoy it muchly. i like my friends, muchly most of the time. except patrick. because he did something really stupid that pissed me off. and today was supposed to be our date day. but i'm thinking not. he hasn't called. so oh well!

callir @ 2005-06-11T14:16:00

2005-06-11T21:27:42Z

well last night was interesting. i am so close to becoming ungrounded, i can SMELL freedom!! anyways. i had work till like 7 but it didn't seem like a logical time so i told my mom it was 9 so i had a couple hours to chill. i went to the lighthouse cos i was going to go to the show but i decided not to go in because LEGO was there, which is a real stupid band that is like rap/grindcore nasty? so i just pulled up. and Brandon just busted out through the door and was like. "CALLIE YOU CAME!!" haha it was great, i felt special. so i hung out with him for a while and then ERIC! came. and that made me happy cos i had not seen ERIC! in a long time. like since school let out. yeah and he was happy to show me his new BEAUTIFUL scion car thing. i wish i had a cool car. annnnd thennnnn, DUSTIN came! and i was happy times two! it was so cool. i was so happy to see my friends. so i hung out with brandon and some people he knew. turned out they were super young and i felt gross. (13+) yeah. so i decided i'd rather hang out with dustin and eric so i did but then i left & went over to lisa's house and that was funny. i just don't even know, but it was good, but corey was sick. i felt bad but he has pretty hair! so then i went home cos it was about nine. my mom was being annoying so yeah. i came home and talked with HEATHER COS SHE IS HOME NOW AND I AM SO HAPPY! haha. and of course sammy, and i talked to greg, mostly until morning. it's lovely. and i am happy to have some good friends.

chris ♥
scratsktr: if i had a million bucks would you marry me?
cute like cancer: sure.
scratsktr: yes
scratsktr: i'm gonna remember that
cute like cancer: haha okay
scratsktr: hmm... how can i make my first million really quick like
cute like cancer: i have no idea.
scratsktr: then we could like... buy a big house and lots of hookers and listen to Deftones live in our living room
scratsktr: it'd be a grand ol' time
cute like cancer: that would be sexy